CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACTTURKISH (H)AIRLINES: If Qantas didn’t already have enough to worry about, The Federal Government has finally agreed to start allowing international airline services to increase their operations in Australia. With the announcement of a large expansion for Turkish Airlines, Australia can also expect a large expansion in Turkish Hairlines. However, the sheer increase of flights to Istanbul is enough for celebration – as balding Australian men begin cheering enthusiastically around the nation. A sharp increase of Australians wearing doorag-style headwear is expected across the country over the next few years, as droves of single men return from that part of the world with a fringe that you’d have to charge your barber twice as much for. Men with fucked teeth and crooked noses also have cause for celebration, as they begin planning their 3 week getaways to the Anatolian Peninsula, which they will not be documenting on social media in any way shape or form.

Source: Daily Nation December 19, 2023 15:46 UTC